Category Archives: humor

Tweetards my ongoing attempt to make a recursive name to spotlight the act of social media douchebaggery.

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Filed under Culture-internet, humor

Twitters
Worst
Ephemera
Emanates-from
The
Arseholes
Retweeting – the
Douchebags – of
Social media

Is it just my memory that lasts longer than 30 second commercials? Bloomberg is vocal the responsibilities of public figures that are not elected:)

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Filed under Culture-internet, General, humor, Media mayhem, political

Don’t get me wrong there has to be consequences  for carrying a loaded firearm into a nightclub that is discharged. Like a hole in the leg, pain and maybe the end of your athletic career. Still that’s not good enough  we really have to show em:)  Shame that the  same zeal doesn’t apply to those that enforce the laws

Hospital suspends worker who failed to report NFL star’s gunshot – CNN.com

Bloomberg, who has long fought against illegal gun ownership, said public figures “make their living because of their visibility. They are the role models for our kids, and if we don’t prosecute them, to the fullest extent of the law, I don’t know who on Earth we would. It makes a sham, a mockery of the law.”

One word answer…..

Spitzer.

Feeling Chipper vicar? I’d a ho smash my butt ( Uk Humor only;) )

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Filed under Anarchy from the UK, humor

Vicar in casualty with spud stuck in backside | The Sun |News

The clergyman told stunned casualty nurses he fell backwards on to his kitchen table while hanging curtains.

He happened to be nude at the time of the mishap.

23 squidoo An 8 armed action hero.

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Filed under Culture-internet, humor

Ok it’s an octopus but you can’t tell your cephalopods  from a hole in the ground  and your attitude, quick frankly , towards the cuttlefish stinks.

So just shut up and enjoy this animated appetizer  ink his way into the history books.

Via Found on the web

Doogie Howser WMD aka Dr Horrible’s sing along blog

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Filed under Culture-internet, humor, Media mayhem, rambling, reviews

Fans of things Whedonesque  have got a lot to be thankful for.  This show may be instructive on proving that  Unions still have a use 🙂 That point is  that whenever a sea change in technology ,be it media or  improvements to manufacturing , education ( yeah right)  they  are always present in the role of societal Canute.   I will grant you their role had value back in the early days but    in the latter half of the 20C it’s been all about maintaining their power from that point  on , the organization  uber alles.  I digress but this show is a product of the WGA  strike and rumblings on  who gets paid  what  in relation to online content from both sag and aftra.  There’s a great post on that here from the closest thing to an objectivist I think you’ll find in media ( I saw closest as I am agnostic about their existence;)  

Anyway this is a mini web series , three episodes, and other than  note that anyone I know  already has this , so , so   who the hell am I telling?   Frak that .  

Think live action Venture brothers with a tad of Pinky  tossed in.  Seeing Captain Mal, er Hammer  again  rocks as the “good “  guy that wants to take the heroine  on a tour of a VW’s rear , you know somewhere uncomfortable was great. It’s not like most web shows , ephemeral to the power of mayfly   , you truly can  watch  and sing along more times that may be healthful:)   Don’t be horrible,  buy this , don’t rip it off as I want to see more, more more!

Now this is a cunt of a problem. Reporting news without coming off as a bit of a pussy.

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Filed under humor, Media mayhem

I would have thought blasphemy  to be a victimless crime.  The funniest thing about the story  was the article having cunt obscured as a word but a picture showing the same word on the t shirt.  Maybe that’s why this is hard to take seriously 🙂

Silly  Aussie,  rights are for Amurrricans;)

ZGeek – Teen arrested for “Jesus is a Cunt” T-shirt

Quote:
It is blasphemous, will get you arrested and has sparked debate about Australia’s lack of a Bill of Rights.

Meet Cradle of Filth, an extreme metal band from England. Their offensive shirt that claims ‘Jesus is a (expletive deleted)’ and depicts a nun masturbating.

A 16-year-old was arrested on Monday for wearing the shirt and was charged with offensive behaviour under the Summary Offences Act 2005 for public nuisance.

Senior Sergeant Arron Ottaway said the teen was walking along Hollywell Road, in Biggera Waters, when a officer saw him.

This is the kind of thing that “Dear Abby” didn’t cover: Otters eating kittens.

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Filed under Culture-internet, General, humor

Over at Yahoo Answers there are people that have the need to ask questions such as

Will an adult otter eat 10 week old kittens.?

It’s not someone looking for a cheap, but adorable,way to feed otters but the replies are great. So if the idea of kitten consumption offends I’d steer clear of this.

German media / people prove Americans don’t monopolize the stupid headline

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Filed under humor, rants, reality

A polar bear eats fish and people are surprised?   Dummkopfs!

Now if the polar bear   braided the hair of a little girl,Changed from Coke to Pepsi or  migrated to the woods and then used a porta potty that may be news.  Otherwise I think there’s a few more items that should be placed in that enclosure for the bear to play with:D

The Frankfurter Allgemeine news website reports that Knut “senselessly murdered the carp”, fishing them out, playing with them and then leaving the remains.

BBC NEWS | Europe | Shock at polar bear’s carp kill

The most amusing tale of marsupial on man action since Skippy got into the peanut butter.

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Filed under humor

This has to be The most amusing tale of marsupial on man action I’ve seen for a couple of weeks.

“I’ll retract the rape complaint from the wombat, because he’s pulled
out. Apart from speaking Australian now, I’m pretty all right you know.
I didn’t hurt my bum at all.”

Man sentenced over wombat rape claim – ABC News (Australian Broadcasting Corporation)

Prosecutors said alcohol played a large part in Cradock’s life, although his defence lawyer said he was not drunk on the afternoon of the phone calls.

Proving my point : There’s a blog, forum and podcast for everyone. one of Man’s oldest diseases makes it to the information age.

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Filed under General, humor, reality

One of the ways I “sell” podcasts and blogs to people is by telling them that no matter how esoteric their interests are that there is likely to be a blog , forum and podcast about it. Yep even the people with embarrassing conditions have groups. ( no they are not the same as churches but a good guess my cynical reader;) )

Seriously my reivers diet of flesh , blood and offal when combined with inactivity has not only caught up with me it’s taken an early lead. That is going to stop. Oh that an my ancestors. Bastards that’s why we never invite you around to dinner ( Oops riffing off DNA there)

Dark Ages..

Dr’s , medical journal and chance running into people with the same condition. Unlikely. The most you get is a pamphlet of organizations that survive by your condition surviving:D So you get 2-3 xeroxed copies

Today.

If I relied on the hand outs , about gout, without a doubt I’d be a more depressed otter. As it is, and as it seems to be with most conditions, the cause and effect has been established by the women in white coats, a reduction of Xtra beef causes less whY does this hurt? Sadly it’s mostly the widest bromides with information that is taken from the most extreme cases and then generalized into rules for everyone. E.g Low sodium. for those that need it great, sadly that means “everyone” since the medical people don’t want to send wrong messages. e.g hey ethnic group a : you are more at risk from this but to make you feel better we’ll tell everyone to do the same. Same with gout.

Now I have to work out what’s true for me.

Gout Pal Interactive – Discuss Gout Symptoms and Treatments With Friendly Gout Sufferers

Expelled the movie. The funniest hypocrites on the block.

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Filed under Demon Haunted World, humor, pat, reality

I’m not going to spoil this one. Suffice to say that reality beats fiction any day. Sadly Adams is no longer around to make this stuff up but the residents of the B ark are quite happy to fill in.

You never know in some far out universe , on some very lucky day you may win against the forces of idiocy.

Pharyngula: EXPELLED!

I’m still laughing though. You don’t know how hilarious this is. Not only is it the extreme hypocrisy of being expelled from their Expelled movie, but there’s another layer of amusement. Deep, belly laugh funny. Yeah, I’d be rolling around on the floor right now, if I weren’t so dang dignified.

A quick neologism for these times when people will believe anything .

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Filed under humor

New word from me:

Psycnic : Someone that sees the future and knowing that it was going to suck anyway

It’s 2k8 and there’s no KLF song to rage against this year. Damn.

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Filed under blogging, Culture-internet, humor

Greetings.

Happy new year, at least one of  the many calenders that are out there. I prefer the dragons and fireworks
myself to  the irony of the “timeless”  Dick Clark looking like didn’t go down
to Georgia, but over to Switzerland instead and lost a watch building contest
with “Old Harry”, but I digress. Let’s start out 2008 with a positive message. 

I am positive that elections are a great excuse to get more people blog, vlog
, ne demagogue  this upcoming  election with a torrent of user generated content
seeded by MSM sources ( Oh dear I’ve gone negative early… )

 

Kid’s whine turns into another grape pun

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Filed under humor

To our toddler when shopping at Bev Mo(Drink supermarket for non US types) in the wine section.

one day you’ll    turn from something  smellier to  a sommelier,

You’re McFuckin’ kidding me? Surely this is taking the McPiss . UK MacDonalds take on their customers.

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Filed under Bad CS, Culture-internet, humor

 This is one of those tales I love.   Most people here don’t believe me when I said that the UK was so hostile to car drivers that just being able to find somewhere to drive it and park was a chore.  Pay the toll to get over the bridge, pay the toll to get into the city, pay to park   etc.  Now it looks like McDonald’s in the UK have decided that it’s in their interests to send $150 fines to people who have the gall(  they probably have that minced up in their  happymeal ) to eat their and pay for the meal.  The UK people don’t seem to be  ba da da da daaaa loving it.  So that’s funny.  What’s funnier and I have this debate  quite a lot is that just because you hire a third person to be a dick on your behalf doesn’t make you  less  culpable just highlights how  crass you are.  Hey  customers we’ve paid a company to shit in your food but since we don’t profit from it, swallow ok?      See how it goes.   Eat lunch one day,  get fined,  refuse to pay get a larger fine, then  they take you by force and it all goes pear shaped.   If you need to commit a crime in the UK  mug someone . You’ll get less of a fine, some assistance with education, rented accommodation and some money  .. just don’t park while beating the shit out of the pensioner. 

McParking row as slow eaters given heavy fines | The Guardian | Guardian Unlimited

McDonald’s in effect washed its hands of the charge, saying it had been imposed by Civil Enforcement and the burger giant did not profit from it.